You are in love and have been together in blissful matrimony for a few years now. Everything is going great, you both share great chemistry and you are spending even more time together.
But there is something wrong with your time together in bed which is dull on certain days, while on other days, it goes strong. This may make you feel that there is something wrong with your sex life, but it may not be so.
Occasional stress, headaches, work pressures and other tensions do tend to affect your mood swings in bed, but this does not make your sex life unhealthy.
Here are some of the in-between unsettling days in bed, which contrary to your thinking, are actually normal and your sex life is actually healthier than you think.
- You go without sex for days together
Ok so you are not having sex each night of your married life, but so what? Does that mean you are not normal? C’mon a lot of married couples do not have sex even thrice a week, leave alone every day. A couple needs to chalk out their own needs and desires and strike a healthy balance with the frequency. A healthy sex life cannot be judged by the frequency with which it takes place in a couple’s married life. However, if both of you experience a prolonged lack of desire, then it is advisable to consult a doctor or a sex therapist to understand the problem.
If you thought sex was all about being able to get the orgasm, you are living under a misconception. Sex is all a play of mind, it is more about pleasure and love. And sex does not only mean having an intercourse. It is ok sometimes to simply indulge in a highly romantic and satisfying foreplay or oral sex. You both can have the most intimate and pleasurable moments, even if either one of you does not want to have sex. Masturbation is another option that will keep you both happy and…
Having been married for over four years, Viraj, 29, and his wife Shikha, 27, noticed there was something amiss in their sex life. Their work and family affairs had taken over their minds so much that they never did find time for intimacy. It was then that Shikha would actually mark dates on the calendar to ensure they set aside time to cozy up together. Setting aside time shows commitment and a desire to make things happen.
- You go straight to sleep after a romantic dinner
If you thought a romantic, candle lit dinner was a perfect mood setter for some great action in bed, think again. Experts say, that a rich and elaborate dinner , instead of getting you in the mood for sex, can actually get you to sleep. And if ever your partner has a choice between sex and sleep, after the your dinner treat, sleep is sure to win his/her votes. So, try to go light on your meals and instead get some aphrodisiacs to munch on, such as honey, oats, oysters, chocolate, as these would only spark the fire within.
Your 12-hour hectic work schedule, outings with kids on weekends, giving enough time to parents and relatives and all other vanity things seem to take most of your time and there is hardly any time left for you both to spend together. So then what do you do? Well, quickies come to your rescue. Quickies that can happen in the shower, in those gracious ten minutes when your kid has gone down the street and you get privacy, and various other minutes you can avail of. Quickies are exciting, quick and refreshing and keep you happy until you leisurely meet next.
You had an intense fight with your partner, and both of you are looking opposite ways. At such a time, what one most wants is reassurance, that despite difficult times and opposite opinions, there will be no crack in the relationship bond. Sex that follows a heated argument reconfirms the intimacy between a couple and brings peace, even if it is just for that moment.
So, cheer up and relax in your partner’s lap and take things easy……..